The alarm went off at 6:45 a.m. on our Epic day. The sun was already rising, and it was predicted to be the hottest day of the trip so far. We were all full of anticipation for our first visit to this brand-new theme park.
The drive took about 40 minutes, including the usual stop–go stretch on the I-4. Neil paid the ridiculous $35 parking fee, and — typically — we were directed to the furthest point possible along our row.
The park didn’t officially open until 10 a.m., but as we walked up at 9 a.m., people were already queuing to get in. We had splashed out on the expensive Express Passes on top of the already expensive entry tickets. I tried not to calculate what the whole thing worked out to on a per-hour basis.
We had to get our Express Passes validated, which pleasingly meant being sent to an empty security line, bypassing the main queue to reach a ticketing section inside the park. Everywhere was spotless, shiny, and new — we were already impressed. The theming was beautifully done, and both Karen and I thought it reminded us of Tokyo DisneySea — which, for some reason, irritated Neil.
After a few photos, we headed for the Ministry of Magic to ride the Harry Potter attraction. Neil had heard it was still having teething problems thanks to its new technology. There was already an enormous queue outside the entrance at 9:20 a.m.
We walked to the Express entrance but were told we couldn’t use it until we’d joined the main outside queue. Dutifully, we did so — just as it started moving. It took about ten minutes to reach the entrance, where we discovered that others with Express Passes were being let straight in. I was not amused and let the staff member who’d sent us to the back know about it. He feigned all knowledge of having done so, which only annoyed me more.
I gritted my teeth and marched along the Express line past hundreds of people in the 150-minute regular queue. Karen and Neil told me off for walking too quickly and not admiring the queue details, but I just wanted to get on the ride.
And what a ride it was. Excellent from start to finish — I couldn’t tell where the real sets ended and the screens or animatronics began. It simply has to be seen to be believed. We were back outside by 9:50 a.m., ten minutes before the park had officially opened. Those without Express Passes wouldn’t be seeing daylight for another two and a half hours.
Next up was Starlight Racers. Karen sat this one out and minded the bags. I tried not to think too much about the fearsome roller coaster I was about to face — especially when I was reminded that this was the ride someone had recently died on. I always feel bad that Neil often ends up doing these on his own, so I went for it.
To say it was fast and intense would be an understatement. After the first launch, I was lifted out of my seat through every twist and hump. Just as I began to relax, there was a second launch, and I spent what felt like hours hanging upside down. I came off breathless, sweating, and firmly of the opinion that once was enough for a lifetime.
We then headed to the Dark Universe area, where we all rode The Curse of the Werewolf coaster — great fun — followed by Monsters Unleashed. I was really starting to like the Express Pass now, as we breezed past a 120-minute queue straight to the front. The ride promptly broke down, of course, and we waited 15 minutes for it to restart.
It was worth it. The ride was intense and clever, with plenty of time spent lying flat in our harnessed seats. All the classic horror icons were there — like Frankenstein, and Dracula, — and it was brilliant fun.
We stopped for a short break outside the nearby tavern, where Neil had a “Garlic Bread Stake for the Heart” snack to ward off any lingering fiends. Then we ‘saw’ the Invisible Man doing a meet and greet.
Then we plunged into Nintendo Land — an assault on all the senses. Bright, busy, and loud. Cleverly done, I’m sure, but not really my thing.
The Mario Kart ride had a 150-minute wait, but with Express we were on in 15. Supposedly a park highlight, but neither Karen nor I understood it at all. It involved hats, controls, steering, and some sort of scoring system. Neil wasn’t thrilled that I somehow won with 147 points (or coins, or something) despite just pressing my buttons at random.
Next came Donkey Kong, another roller coaster — and this one we all loved. Fantastically themed and designed, it really has to be experienced to be appreciated. I’d have gone again, but that would have meant queuing with the “common people.”
Karen and I then felt we’d earned a proper sit-down, so we headed to the central Celestial Park area and a conveniently placed Starbucks. We enjoyed bucket-sized teas while listening to a live band. As we relaxed, NCFC kicked off their latest match and were already losing within four minutes. We watched the goal go in and groaned in unison.
Next, we wandered to the Isle of Berk — and no, I hadn’t heard of it either — home of the dragons from How to Train Your Dragon. We loved the theming and the coaster there, which turned out to be Karen’s favourite of the day.
We decided to watch the show in that area and managed to get seats just as it began. It was fun and well performed, though there was a pause for a technical hitch midway through. Neil was disappointed, as apparently a dragon was supposed to fly over the audience. Since we hadn’t been expecting that, it didn’t spoil it for us — we just assumed the “technical hitch” was the dragon refusing to cooperate.
We went back to the Harry Potter area hoping to see the show there, but it was still not operating — as had been the case all day. Instead, we popped into the French restaurant where Karen and Neil shared an expensive but delicious signature crêpe.
After a bit of shopping and wandering, Karen and I decided we’d “done” the park. We returned to Celestial Park for another drink and a hot sandwich from Starbucks. The park looked beautiful as dusk fell and the lights came on. We listened to the band while Neil went off to re-ride a few of his favourites.
When he rejoined us, we strolled over to the carousel, which Karen and Neil rode before we slowly made our way out, soaking up the atmosphere one last time. It had been a really great day.
Our only real complaint was the stairs — every single ride involved dozens of steps getting on and off. I think the designers could have been cleverer about that. I found it tough enough, but it was worse for Karen, and I was proud of how well she coped. We left the park tired but happy after 11 full hours.
On the way back to the villa, we stopped at Raising Cane’s for a quick, inexpensive dinner — one Neil had wanted to try. I thought it was fine, though neither Karen nor I were particularly taken with the sauce it’s apparently famous for.
As we ate outside, we saw our first-ever rocket streak across the night sky — a SpaceX Starlink launch from Cape Canaveral. We watched the glowing trail as it climbed into orbit. A fitting end to a terrific day.
Back at the villa, Karen and I enjoyed a glass of wine before retiring — happily exhausted.
