One of the attractions of visiting Florida at this time of year has always been the weather. The hurricane season is generally over — apart from that one year. The rainy season has passed — apart from the very occasional shower. The terrific heat and humidity have eased, giving way to beautifully normal hot days.
What we had never experienced, however, was a genuinely cold day — until today, which was forecast to be the coldest of the year so far thanks to some freak Arctic weather front.
It didn’t help that we had an early 7.20am start, leaving the villa for Fort Wilderness and our scheduled 8.30am Segway Backcountry Adventure Tour. It was a bracing 38°F as we pulled away. Karen and Neil, being sensible, wore trousers. I, however, was in Florida and refused to succumb.
Apart from the fact that Karen and I enjoy Segway tours, another reason we’d splashed out on what was quite an expensive one was so that Neil could get a look around the Disney campsite and its facilities. Karen and I had done so back in the days when they actually allowed non-guests in to explore.
We parked at the Outpost lot and waited for a bus to take us to the Bike Barn, deep within the enormous camping ground where the tour would start.
“Cold” wasn’t the word for it. It was blinking freezing. The sky was deep blue, the sun was shining, but the wind cut straight through. I ended up with four layers on and was still shivering. Thankfully, the bus didn’t take long.
The driver dropped us off and pointed the way to walk. The Bike Barn was locked when we arrived, though to be fair, we were fifteen minutes early. By now I was cold to the bone and less than impressed with what felt like a very un-Disney start. When the tour guides finally appeared, they took ages setting everything up before calling the five of us inside for a briefing.
Last week in Clearwater, our “briefing and training” had taken about three minutes before we were let loose on the busy streets. Today, being Disney (and terrified of litigation), the briefing and training took up more than half the entire tour time. We even had to pass the equivalent of a driving test — including an emergency stop. There were so many potential dangers and hazards mentioned that Karen started to worry about what lay ahead.
In the end, none of it was necessary.
By the time we finally set off, I’d lost all feeling in my hands and my whole body was shaking. The Segways were set to “turtle” mode — limited to 6mph instead of the 12mph we’d enjoyed last week. Except mine wouldn’t go faster than four. I was soon trailing at the back until one of the guides discreetly removed “turtle” mode so I could catch up.
Despite its glowing reviews, the tour itself was… fine. We’d expected more — perhaps exploring off-grid areas or seeing parts of Disney normally off-limits to visitors. The only real highlight was the stables where all the Disney parade horses are kept, though I suspect Neil could have led us there on foot.
It was fun, if short, and by the end we were all numb with cold. We ducked into the nearest trading post to thaw out, then caught a bus down to Pioneer Hall, where we enjoyed a warming drink — hot cocoa for Karen and a muffin for good measure.
After we’d thawed, we took the boat across Bay Lake to the Magic Kingdom entrance and looked wistfully at everyone going inside. Instead, we boarded the Resort Monorail to the Polynesian, where we wandered around the lobby and shops.
At last, the temperature crept up to “acceptable.” As we walked past the new Polynesian Tower, Chip and Dale suddenly appeared and accosted us for no reason whatsoever. We continued to the Grand Floridian, where we had lunch in their “cheaper” café. Neil rolled his eyes when I ordered a kid’s meal — half the size and half the price — while Karen tackled an enormous turkey sandwich.
We lingered upstairs watching the new bar below, which had only opened the day before. The queue was enormous, and the bartender was churning out Florida cocktails — citrus fruit and champagne concoctions at $22 each. We watched him make over $400 worth in minutes, getting through two bottles of Taittinger. I suppose if you can afford to stay at the Grand Floridian, that’s just pocket change. As they say, if you have to ask the price, you probably can’t afford it.
We caught the monorail back to the Magic Kingdom, now teeming with people queuing for Mickey’s Christmas Party — ninety minutes before opening. We were envious again and said perhaps next year we’d join them.
The boat ride back to Wilderness Lodge, then the bus to the car park, were smooth enough, as was the drive back to the villa. Bravely, and despite the temperature dropping again, Karen still got into the pool to continue her exercise regime. It’s clearly working — her hip has held out well so far.
By 6pm we were heading out again, this time to Saltgrass Steakhouse. It was busy, but we got a table after fifteen minutes. The food was top-notch, and the bill was even better — with Karen’s birthday $25 credit on her Landry card, a Groupon for a free $10 on top of the $40 I’d prepaid, and to cap it all, a free giant slab of chocolate cake presented to Karen to take away.
A couple of quick shopping stops followed — Karen had returns to make and socks to buy (having been distracted last time). Neil waited in the car.
Finally, back at the villa, we opened the “Kinda Dry” Blueberry Wine we’d been saving. It was as good as we remembered. We rationed ourselves to one glass each, to eke it out, before falling into bed by 10.30pm.
The forecast is for much higher and normal temperatures from tomorrow – so fingers crossed.
